Spiraling thoughts are easily identifiable as any obsessive, repeat, or circuitous thoughts that grip your attention in a negative way. You become obsessed, and can’t stop thinking about that thing. This is a thought spiral, and they usually weigh you down. Spiraling thoughts make it so that it’s hard to focus on anything else, and […]
getting to know yourself
A Simple Breakdown of The 5 Love Languages
25 years ago a marriage counselor named Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a now-iconic book called The 5 Love Languages (which, yes, you can buy on Amazon). Over two decades later, new generations of people continue to discover his concept of “the five love languages” and apply them to their lives and relationships. What is now […]
5 Strategies for Building a Resilient Mindset
Resilience– also known as psychological resilience— is understood as our ability to recover from setbacks and remain relatively unruffled by what life throws at us. It’s not really something you can measure so much as feel. We all have it, but like most aspects of mental fortitude, some of us are better at it than […]
Beautiful Life Lesson: Thom Yorke, Rothko, and How We Interpret Joy
Sometime in the year 2000, Radiohead frontman Thom Yorke sat for an interview on Dutch television about the making of Radiohead’s Kid A and the rough time he had separating his personal life from the world of celebrity after the monumental success of 1997’s Ok Computer. In this interview, Yorke relayed an anecdote that has […]
A Prayer For When You’ve Hit Rock Bottom
So– you’ve hit rock bottom, you’re feeling scared and lonely, and this is what you consider to be your lowest point. Maybe you’re sick, maybe you’ve experienced massive loss, maybe your worst fear or greatest terror in life has been realized: now what? Even if you’re not religious, you can still use mindful self-talk– which […]
A Quick Breakdown of Byron Katie’s “The Work”, & How To Practice At Home
Byron Katie is a best-selling author and thought leader famous for her methodology of working with difficult emotions, which she calls “The Work”. She is most famous for this practice, which helps folks who are struggling or seeking greater mental wellbeing identify the root of what is bothering them. In a climate where many people […]
Why We Grieve People We’ve Never Met
The death of a beloved celebrity or public figure often brings with it intimate outpourings of grief— often from people who never met the departed. This begs interesting questions about the psychological impact of idol worship, public figures and relationships writ large, as well as our personal sense of wellbeing in the world. In the […]
The Art of Listening Better, in 3 Easy Mantras
If you follow me on Instagram you know that I’ve been on this kick recently of really trying to be a better listener. What follows is a parable that sums up why. A few weeks ago, I heard a conversation between critically-acclaimed psychologist Harriet Lerner and shame researcher Brené Brown that piqued my interest with […]
Boost Your Mood By Creating a “Brag File”
Building confidence is an active pursuit that requires regular effort, which is why creating a so-called “brag file” can help. It’s an easy way to boost your mood when times get tough, or if you’re feeling down, jealous, or exceedingly self-conscious. Making a brag file is easy. Keep a running list of things that you […]
Michelle Obama Is Dealing with “Low Grade Depression,” Too
In the latest episode of the new Michelle Obama Podcast, the former First Lady said she is currently battling “some form of low grade depression.” “Not just because of quarantine, but because of the racial strife, and just seeing this administration, watching the hypocrisy of it, day in and day out, is dispiriting,” she said […]